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Spirit woke me up for my own sunrise ceremony today. I did my best, and then did some beading, and then got around to sitting and meditating too. I've been thinking a lot about where my life is right now and where I would like it to go, or, when I'm in a bad mood, where it should already be. I've been thinking about young kids, and me as a young kid, and what I would have wanted to hear, what I needed to know, to navigate the complexities of life so the simplicity of it all could emerge and guide me from one transition to another.

Transition periods are usually to the brim with fear-based actions for most people. Rarely do we step into uncertainty and breathe it in; we want clarity, sureness, assurance. We want guides, maps, comfort. This works against us and coaxes out our fears so they begin to be all we interact with, and create from. Our need for sureness sucks us into familiar patterns that keep us comfortable. This comfortableness does us in. It's contraction, resistance, and egoic delusion.

Uncertainty is your friend. It's reality. We don't quite know that we will end the day in our beds, but we pretend we do. We pretend today is just another day like every other day so far: predictable, livable, regular. But each day holds as much uncertainty as the day before. Uncertainty shouldn't be ignored but embraced, deeply.




This may be my last morning, this may be my last coffee, this may be my last sunrise. Considering life like this makes it real, makes it valuable, and makes me scared and energized. If this was the last of it, how would I want to be? Where would my mind be?

Embraced, uncertainty fills me up with the clarity I need. The other way, chasing certainty, only brings fear. This is what I would have wanted to know as a child. I would have wanted to know the knife edge we walk daily, and how to live from that place where clarity shines so brightly you just can't miss it. I would have wanted to know what would make my valuable life more truly livable, as I moved in the world from a place of real energy. So that's what I'm thinking about today.

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