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ask yourself the big question




Some of my clients (okay, a lot of my clients) struggle with fully comprehending the immensity of the self they are. "How are you doing?" is usually greeted with a mind-based response, or if the client considers themselves to be aware, they pause a little and respond, or list out grievances with personal annotations that make their grievances feel, to them, less like holding a victim-position, and more like self-conscious witnessing.




When I ask, "How are you doing?" in a session, your "aura" expands with unprocessed, unwanted, unacknowledged subconscious data and I see this filter down into a response. I learned to look for this while working with an elder who did medicine work; he'd ask the question over and over to different people, and his gaze (and his being) widened to accept the subconscious data. He'd tell me to look, look at what they do, look at what he does; don't listen, don't try to figure anything out, just sit and look, all day long, day after day. The subconscious data expansion into a filtered response remains mostly the same for person to person, when asked "How are you doing?".




So I approach "How are you doing?" in a session ready to hold and see all that doesn't make it down the filter. If pieces of the filtered response and the subconscious data align, we move it to clear it. We bring it down the chute and onto our laps.




You can do this yourself every day with journaling. Ask yourself "How are you doing?" and let the mind-based response come. Ask again, "How are you doing?" and let the grievances and annotations come. Ask finally, "How are you doing?" and see what's left, the unsaid stuff, the stuff you don't want to look at, the stuff that makes you feel something more deeply. You can clear 98% of your own subconscious data this way, if it's done daily or every 2 days.




Once cleared, once cleared regularly and often and you begin to feel naturally free inside, you can begin to see this subconscious data expansion everywhere, even when not asking people "How are you doing?" . Don't use this gift to pry into people, or to build your ego of specialness; use it to build your compassionate side, your self acknowledgment of "I was there once too" side. The world needs more of this: compassionate consideration for every living being.




I know, it sounds like it's getting close to love and light. It's not. It's getting us close to living the good life, to being good neighbours and to hosting good relationships, to realness, to real interconnection. Love and light is deflection, well-intentioned but not too real-ly, deeply considerate: it's a way to step away "gracefully" and quickly without getting too (real-ly) involved. Compassionate consideration is feeling it deeply, knowing it can be you, and responding from that place of shared, connected reality. It's important, and we need more people in the world who know how to do it, and are willing to do it even when it's inconvenient, because it allows a reality to emerge that is different from what we are currently living. And who doesn’t want that?


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