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weirdness should be normalness because it's so commonplace


So I've been quiet; I'm normally quiet except for a stream of reposts and some quotes and some pics but nothing too personal, nothing private. I struggle with the idea that my private life is private, even private in relation to close friends and Daughter. This echoes back to childhood, when I was very small, trying to understand how this world I seem to be moving body in and through did not (and still kind of does not) match the landscape and the map I remembered. And still remember.

I remember a me beyond me; I actually remember a few of these, in snippets and in whole stories, but the me I feel I am is having a second act, here in this life now. It's taken too many years to sort of bridge that awareness but I truly believe had I not been born Nipissing, specifically, it would have taken longer.




From what I've been told, Nipissings were spacewalkers, able to see, be, and be seen through time, space (outer and inner), location, and in non-reality (such as dreams). Since it took me so long to bridge my own awareness of my own situation, I wonder now how long it takes our young Nipissings to come to an understanding about how they work vs how they are told they work (as humans here). How many "old" Nipissings had experiences and inklings but had no way to come to an understanding about this. So much has been lost with contact. But there are still spacewalkers. I run into them here and there, both in non-reality and reality. They all say the same thing: it's true, and it's a skillset that's drifting away.




I'm still trying to learn more and read more about Nipissing cosmology/spirituality and my own understanding; old Buddhists texts are actually quite informative re: steps and procedures to lift yourself out of the life-hum and into the real-hum, and I feel like had Nipissing texts existed, they would have echoed many of the same steps (as, what I have found matches up once the pomp and ceremony is swept away).




I'm not sure what the point of this post is. I just felt it was necessary to step out of the background of it all and state clearly I am perhaps the same level of weird you are, and if you want to tell me weird things like how you can hear plants and animals or you see stuff and you're all like "let's table this because I don't know what to do" but you really want to be able to unpack the experience and not have your sanity judged, I'm your gal.





My dream is to one day have a retreat center back on Nipissing land where an exploration of reality/non-reality (that is not all woo-woo and icky) and an individualized coming to self-understanding can happen. Maybe that's the point of this post. A warning, a vision launched: if you know me, you know a weirdo.

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